I’ve just read an article on Helium about nightmare housemates. It’s enough to make one think that sharing housing is a bad idea. It isn’t. There are plenty of wonderful people out there who are great housemates.
What makes a housemate a nightmare? Self-centeredness. Plain and simple. The nightmare housemate breaks agreements and/or refuses to modify their behavior when something becomes an issue.
You avoid having nightmare housemates by knowing what you want and carefully interviewing. Once you’ve decided that the interviewee is a potential housemate you must check references and employment. True, the potential housemate will only send you to people who are going to recommend them, nonetheless the reference doesn’t know what you are looking for. You can find out quite a lot about a person from references. Ask for two. And then talk to them. Engage in a long conversation. Find out how they know the person, how long, whether they’ve ever lived with them, and if they have what that experience was like. Ask for specific stories. Find out how often the person has moved. All you have to do for checking employment is to call the organization main number and ask, “Does [housemate name] work in your organization?”
Also it is essential that the person moving in pays the first month, last month AND security deposit. Don’t waver on this! If your future housemate tries to wheedle with you about any of this take it as a warning about how they will behave when they move in. That extra money is your security about their ability to pay bills and take care of the place.
Some people like to have agreements in writing – the better to ensure that everyone understands the expectations of the arrangement. If you do sit down and make an agreement – do it between the interview and when the person moves in. Don’t have the person move in and then work out a living together agreement. If the person can’t make time to do this, then don’t have them move in.
Most importantly, don’t get desparate for a housemate. The worst mistake I’ve ever made was when I was desparate. It didn’t last long, I kicked her and her boyfriend out within 6 weeks – but it wasn’t fun for the two weeks the situation developed. It’s really awful, in fact nightmarish, to have someone in your home with whom you are uncomfortable, unhappy, or angry. The best defence against nightmare housemates is to choose carefully. It is possible.
