Sharing Housing: Finding and Keeping Good Housemates Rotating Header Image

Can Single Parents Share Housing?

Absolutely.  In addition to the other benefits of reducing housing costs, there are other advantages for two single parents sharing their home.  How well it works depends of course on the adults, the children, and the space being shared.

The first advantage is that the children can play together. This of course depends on the ages and genders of the youngsters, but even children of different ages, when thrown together, figure out how to do stuff. (That is, if they are not addicted to television and video games, but that’s a different issue.) The nice part for the parent is that when children are occupied with each other, they are not seeking parental attention. In one shared housing arrangement, the two adults each have part-time custody of their children. The children enjoy being together so much, and each parent finds it so much easier when both children are there, that the parents are seeking to synchronize their custody arrangements.

The second advantage is that the parent has another adult at home. Depending on the housemate relationship, she may have another person to talk to about her adult life. She can have someone to exchange babysitting so that she can go out while the adult is home and then reciprocate the favor. For quick errands she can leave the child at home with the other adult rather than have to disrupt the child to accompany her. The other adult is there.

It’s very important to consider how the space will be used. Whereas a single person sharing housing usually has a room and the rest of the house is shared, it may be that each single parent will want to have her own living room/play area in addition to the bedroom(s).  Like everything else, this depends a good deal on the personalities and choices available where they are living.

Choosing to share housing with another parent is a good idea.  All the guidelines for selecting a good housemate apply. Interview carefully, know what you can live with and what you can’t, and check references. Beyond those guidelines, make sure you have reasonably congruent approaches to parenting.

Make sure your child also has an opportunity to interview the prospective housemates.  If there’s something that he doesn’t like or trust, pay attention.  Children have good instincts, and it will be their home, too!

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