It never occurred to me that for some sharing a house is shameful. Honestly. It’s always made such good common-sense to share the costs of rent and utilities that pride never entered into it.
I gather that that isn’t the case for many Americans. But why? One reason is a culture that expects adults to be independent. It’s the model of the grown-up. Grown-ups either live with a spouse/partner/family or live alone. Another is the sense of “making it.” Supporting a home alone is the outward manifestation of earning power. Is that right?
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‘Americans’ are very diverse in their living arrangements, depending somewhat on the sub-culture. For example, many Mexican-American families live with in-laws, cousins and other relatives, while this is rare in the Caucasian-American community. The recent economic downturn has had an effect on the number of people willing to look at alternatives to living alone, and it has become increasingly more common for people to seek out less expensive arrangements like housemates. I believe that in the white community the reason is mostly saving money, not wanting to live together.
I’m not sure if ‘pride’ is the reason people don’t want to live together; I’d say it’s more that being an American one knows the story with most other Americans, which is, there are a lot of Narcissists and Self-Absorbed people here, sad to say but true. And so I am inclined to believe finding good housemates is much more difficult here than in Europe. Most potential housemates I talk with want to do it to save money and wouldn’t otherwise want to have housemates.
Also, age and demographics play a huge part. College students almost universally recognise a housemate situation as normal while most middle-aged people do not. Poor people pile into rooms, others do so only as a last resort.